I want to write a good long truth-filled, anticipatory-emanating novel on this here page. But truthfully I don't have much to say.
Not in a bad way.
Not in a good way.
There's just nothing to say - though there is much going on.
Life's going along day by day. Field triping and preschooling and summer prepping and furniture redoing, and living. Lots of living. Laughing. Much praying. Yes, there has been lots of that.
But adoption-wise, journey-wise it's been as silent as the night. That's hard.
As a certain four year old sings random words in the background about, "if you live in Ethiopia...and you want to ride in Ethiopia...then hop on and we'll take you there...it's the mission of the day", as he plays with his recently created chick (or is it a duck?) craft...it's difficult not to wonder: When Lord?
Oddly, as one gets (seemingly) closer to a referral the wait is immensely and intensely more difficult. One realizes quickly that life must continue. Feeling tied to a phone, (whether a landline or a cell) and being loyal to that inanimate doesn't make the call come faster.
And, though crucial and critical and necessary, prayer doesn't even make it faster. It will happen in due course. In His time.
This is a very hard pill to swallow.
But, one must also be reminded that it is all truly in God's time. She's not ready yet. He's not done preparing her. Respect and reverence for the Lord's timing - yes, these are lessons set forth each and every day. Learned and re-learned.
And so, until then - until that very moment - we will continue to live as four. Happy and content as four. Embracing the laughter, the odd four-year-old singing, and the pace of our days.
We also continue to pray fervently that soon, there will be much much more than "there's nothing to say".