Alive And...Well...Well

We are in fact alive and well.

This time last week, not so much.

Two at the Dr, one feeling like she fell out of the stupid tree, hitting most branches on the way down, after said visit. Perhaps she drew the short straw. Regardless, going to proved an exercise both in a sense of futility but fortunately also as an exercise in prescription reception. (On the To Do List: find a new GP. The sweet, wonderful, ever kind children we all seek our best to raise do, from time to time offer enough free advise and reminder of "Mama you just don't know" that an added dose simply is not necessary from the Doc. Especially when said Mama was in fact correct and trained professional, well, not so much.)

We now feel better.

{monkeying around...}

For now, a few photos are all we've got. As we head into our week of Winter Break and Family Day (yay Alberta!), there will be more. For now, just some colour seizing a few of our moments over the past week.

{someone turned 5.

hard to believe he was a month younger than makeda is now, when we started our adoption journey.

very hard to believe.

and best not to ponder for too long.

instead, we continue to be thankful and rejoice.}

{we had the best Harari playdate last week. warmed my heart

...pure ethiopian joy in the form of much giggling, running around, and joyful playing!}

That project mentioned a few posts back is still in the works...nearly ready to share. Just needs a few tweaks and a bit more TLC. Last week the latter was given all to the babe. And the Mama.

A Pair And A Sweater

Long before she came home...likely, (certainly?!) before our referral, I made a sweater and leg warmer set for Ms Makeda. And while it's still quite roomy, after looking at the dusting of snow which fell last night and the colour of her onesie which would match the vest perfectly, I thought: "why not?!". She look(s) so cozy in it and it makes this sick Mama feel maybe just a wee bit warm and fuzzy inside. It's soft and makes me want to grab (another) cup of tea and cozy on up.

And, after taking a few glam shots I looked at this one and thought "oh my, whose child is this?!". What kind of unkempt hair has come upon her?! In all my woe-is-me-I-feel-like-I-am-swallowing-nails moments this morning I obviously didn't realize it (the african baby hair) was as bad as it truly is...er...was.

So, we cuddled on the couch and as she rested her head on my chest I fiddled my fingers around a created another single non-row corn row.

Oh...yeah...and Curious George was on. Just for her. Specifically for that purpose - the one of getting her to sit still.

OH MY WORD.

I have become that mother.

The one who bribes her child with television.

Well...she is the third. No two ways about it.

And I'm definitely ill. I have the Dr's appointment to prove it. (If you know me well, you'll know this definitely does prove it.) And the babe's sick too. And she's got an appointment to prove it too. Boo hoo.

I digress. Yes, I am the horrible mother of a 14 month old who turned on the TV simply to be able to non-row corn row her daughter's hair.

But then I looked at it and the single row thing just wasn't doing it for me. So, I doubled it. A pair. Two are better than one.

And it's sweet, no?!

And so that I could get a half decent shot, this time I bribed her with my cell.

Like I said, apparently I am that mother.

I've accepted it. Let's all move on.

For The Box

I was stumped the other night.

My intention for sushi (which transpired the following night) wasn't in the plans. Why? Oh, I didn't check first to see if I had sushi (or any other) vinegar. But, the pre-cooked wild salmon was out of the freezer and wanting to be used so I tried to get all creative and such. I'm on the hunt for new, easy, really healthy, cheap (of course) meals. And I hit the jackpot. This one's for the recipe box I'm sure of it. It got rave reviews by four out of five and I'd say in the world of feeding families with wee ones, those are darn good stats. Don't you agree?

This one was for homemade salmon burgers. I believe the recipe calls from fish from a can but as I mentioned, we had a bunch (!) leftover that had previously been frozen so I used it and oh, the flavour!

The recipe originates here.

My recipe was something like...two large handfuls of salmon (previously cooked), 1 egg, 1 slice of bread (you could easily use spelt/rice/etc bread), salt and pepper, dried oregano, fresh lemon (this added awesome kick and I didn't have any bottle lemon juice...), olive oil (2 tsp).

Soak bread in egg or make bread crumbs and soak them. Ensure the bread completely absorbs all liquid and mash it until smooth. Add salmon, about 3 tsp of salt and 2 tsp pepper, a small handful of oregano (whatever...you can't really overdo dried spices unless...well, you really overdo them...just don't dump the jar and you'll be fine), juice from 1 lemon or about 1 - 2 tbsp. Stir and mix with a fork. Form into patties. We have an old school tupperware burger/pattie maker and it was awesome. They looked, like, professional and stuff. Oh - I saw some mustard powder in the pantry and threw in a couple tsp of that...I just felt it would give the burgers some extra love. But, I can see dill being a fantastic addition!

Throw patties onto a medium heat pre-heated pre-oiled pan. Cook four minutes and flip. Cook another four minutes. There's no real concern with undercooking as the only thing you need to ensure isn't raw is the egg and it'll cook quickly.

I topped our burgers with some leftover french onion chip dip (from our New Years...yes, we really break out around here!), some mustard, feta, and fresh spinach. Yum.

On the note of inexpensive, healthy, creative, homemade meals and lifestyle...well, I'm working on something. It's taking a bit of time and some patience. Major patience. However, seeing as our adoption journey is over...well, the nauseating roller coaster thrill part of it, the season is changing and our focus needs to shift a little. So, give me time and please, a little patience. I'll continue in this space as I love it...for now. As with all things though, if we're not growing we become stagnant and bad things happen to things that are stagnant. And, I chose growth. I will continue to chronicle bits and pieces of our wee crazy life in beautiful, sunny, Alberta with two fantastic growing boys and one beautiful Ethiopian born baby girl...but the focus will shift.

Soon.

We Are.

Makeda's been sucking her thumb as per usual. Most days I don't mind. I know it's something she'll likely continue to do for some time and it's the one of the few things she brings with her from Ethiopia. It's part of what has made her, her. The necessity to self-sooth was developed, I suspect, very early on. And, while I sometimes glance over and think how sad it is that she still does this, I also know it's partially habit. Oh yeah, and she's a baby...it's what a lot of them do.

But today it just got on my nerves. There was a lot of spit and drooling (perhaps another tooth? it has been a couple days since the sixth cut through) and the noises were gross. And I was a bit short tempered. Tired. And a couple times I pulled it out, as I just couldn't handle the noise.

I digress.

This will be redundant for some...perhaps many.

A couple weeks ago when I traveled to the Island we made a quick detour on the way to our final destination. We stopped in at Choices so the incredible women who supported us throughout our journey could meet the little girl they helped bring home. It was a 'can't miss' situation.

While there, we talked briefly about the Hope non-bankruptcy, bankruptcy. A local BC agency closing it's doors after 25 years and having to close their doors on 180 families. Gut-wrenching. Perhaps, the silver lining (if there is any and if we can in fact give it that kind of status) is that this agency wasn't one who dealt with too many international countries. They weren't a facilitator of sorts, such as Imagine was or CAFAC. Doesn't make it any better. Tragically, some families using the services of Hope have already seen and had to live through the nightmare of the Imagine bankruptcy.

CAFAC.

The only other agency in Canada who facilitates adoptions through Ethiopia...as well as many other countries.

CAFAC. Who has been known as a reputable agency for the last 17 years and who has helped create over 700 families, and who is currently working with such a sheer volume of families in all stages of the process that the thought of closing it's doors in two days sickens me. CAFAC...struck by the slowed pace of international adoptions and the financial implications thereof.

This is a tragedy of which nothing compares. And as thousands did on our behalf, it is now our turn to return what may seem like a measly favour but is, in reality huge.*

The Unknown: we've lived it.

Yet, the difference is this agency was, is, and continues to do all it can to keep itself afloat. Monies are all still in trust (novel huh?!). Staff were sadly, though pro-actively let go. Families received communication of problems.

I sent an email to a some family members and close friends tonight, sharing some of the details. It didn't cut too deep until I gave it some real thought. And, until I received an email reminding me of how blessed and lucky Makeda is.

But that's the thing.

It's us.

We are the ones who are blessed, changed, better, our family is complete because of her.

And I can't imagine not having her. I can't imagine being so close yet losing her. I can't imagine our family without her.

I can't imagine.

My heart breaks for those families who's futures are uncertain. Those families who tonight must live the horrific roller coaster on the cusp of the end. Those families who wonder, after waiting for three or more years if their family will ever be created or completed. Those families who just don't know.

International adoption. It's always been said that it's not for the faint of heart. But this is unjust. And in this situation it's at the fault of no one. Systems slowed and more paperwork required (I think of Ethiopia specifically) to protect the innocence of children. Bar none, this is at the crux of it all. The safety, well-being, health, care, protection (!) of orphans. And yet, because of this we now see Ethiopian adoptions taking 5-7 years...thousands of (more) dollars...and it still isn't enough for agencies to remain viable.

And, while families are left in the lurch and suffer emotionally, (financially), immensely, it's not the families who suffer ultimately is it.

It's the orphan. Each. Innocent. Child.

Tonight, as Makeda sucked her thumb through the teething slobber that was her mouth, I could do nothing but pick her up and hold her tight.

We are so very blessed. I won't ever take it...take her...for granted.

--

*PLEASE, do at least one of these things tomorrow.

#1 Call a reporter in Manitoba and tell them why it's a tragedy if CAFAC goes
under/ceases operations.

#2 Call Minister Jennifer Howard's offices 204-945-4173 (ministry) 204-946-0272
(constituency) to voice your support for CAFAC and to encourage the ministry to
allow for interim funidng and fee increases.

#3 if you can't call, email your concerns to the minister:
minfsl(at)leg.gov.mb.ca

Mini Hair

A braid.

A single cornrow-like braid. Except you can't call it a cornrow when there's nothing on either side, right? I still think it's sweet. I've always loved french braiding and while I realize the upcoming years will present many dozens of opportunities for the learning curve to take a significant swoop upward, this was a good place to start. It also negates the occasional "clip war" as I so kindly phrase the battle between Mama and babe, at the end of a long day when all she (the babe that is) wants to rip out her clip.

The true triumph in this little hair style is the fact that she sat still long enough for my fingers to work through.

A little bonus to boot? It's been in for 48 hours (two naps and two log nights' sleeps) and is still holding strong.

It's a start.

9 Degrees

Friends With Texts

In September we moved from a town of 2,500 people to a city of 42,000. I know, right. We went from a place that had no stop lights to one in which I have to drive through two sets to take kids to school. The former was twelve (plus) minutes away the latter is about three or four...if I get stopped by both lights.

This time last year we lived a simple life. Right now it's...busier. It's busier because of said decision/relocation. It's busier because of our kids' ages (and honestly the number of kids we now have). It's busier because we've made it such, through many conscious and unconscious decisions. And it's fantastic. And we work hard and intentionally, to maintain that which we sought when living rural...homemade, from scratch, the importance of basics and necessities and having what we need not what we want. (That last one can be a toughy when living among the masses who have Apple this or that and other name brand items in abundance.)

This time last year I didn't have a cell. Didn't own one. Didn't have any desire (much the opposite, if we're being honest) to have one. The additional cost in my mind wasn't worth it. We didn't go too far from home, ever. After a gross couple months of winter, we took the plunge (ah hem, if we are still being honest, I was finally convinced) and bought a pretty cheap (!) but great plan that didn't put us in the hole or anywhere near the realm of the hole. Free phone, $15/month with a bunch of call minutes and a more than sufficient texting limit.

And it was handy.

And part of the motivation was the hope that a referral call could be received through it.

And it was. You remember, right?! The phone pretty much paid for itself that day.

Not pretty much.

Had I dropped it, stepped on it, and had it become irreplaceable - that day alone it paid for itself.

I digress.

We moved. To the city. And everyone here and their dog (well, pretty much) has one.

And because of that, I've made a lot of friends through texting communication. More than email - that one surprises me. And, most definitely more than through our home phone...we could be in the minority of the population here who still has one. A landline...I wonder if our kids will actually know what that is as they grow up.

Sometimes I wonder, would I have so many whom I call 'friend' here, if I didn't have this little Koodo deal? (Yeah that's right. Koodo. I said it was handy, not fancy.)

Is that superficial to wonder, or is it naive or ?? Am I more content and socially involved because of this silly little thing I often leave at home or forget to turn on? I wonder some days. I wonder, as I sit here having just texted three friends, a husband, and a mother with questions, comments or dialogue in anticipation of the week to come. Are we too reliant and less communicative? Or, on the flip side are we more communicative but perhaps the thoughts and conversation is less personal or in depth. Have we made ourselves so busy that there is simply no alternative.

Or, should I just be grateful?! Should I be thankful that this is one of the means through which we have settled so quickly. The friends I've made: they aren't superficial.

And they all (almost) have cells.

I don't know the answer. But I often wonder.

Meetings

Makeda met her best friend this past weekend. They were lovely together.

They clicked and their unique personalities were so complementary.

It was simply lovely to return to a place full of friends who had hoped, wished, waited, and fervently prayed for Makeda's arrival over the past several years...even if it did pour the entire weekend and a tree nearly stopped us from returning home.

We were blessed.