I Have Never...

Let's play a little game, shall we? You've likely heard of it...though I'm certainly not going to play it in it's most raw form.

The name of this morning's game is, "I Have Never" and if you have _____ (fill-in-the-blank) then you must succumb whatever consequence is at stake. We play it at our staff retreat annually and honestly it gets slightly violent and certainly comical, if nothing else. It's a simple way to get to know others, to embarrass others and get the adrenaline pumping. My version's not that left field, but it's good for a smile.

I have never...

• purchased a pumpkin before halloween in plenty of time to carve it, knowing full well I never intended to do such a thing

• driven past said pumpkin while entering/exiting garage several times daily, only to notice small holes appearing around said pumpkin...all the while doing nothing to further investigate
• waited over a week past halloween to fully investigate and realize birds to be the hole-creating culprits...hmmm, glad to realize we can nutritionally support our local wildlife
• removed pecked-at-pumkin from front step at request of one small three year old, only to bring it inside and allow him to (help) gut it with nothing less than an ice cream scoop, his fork, pizza cutter, and cleaver...yes, I just said cleaver - as in meat cleaver. Oh watever, just keep scrolling.

I have never...

• been so desperate for the flavour of some deliciously imported Archer Farms Fair Trade Organic flavoured coffee that I...upon realizing there were no unused filters left in our abode, would remove the used paper filter from this morning's pot, dump used grinds, rinse said filter, and re-use it. (Yes, we really should invest in a re-usable one.)

Don't judge. Just enjoy maybe a small smile on my behalf.

I have never...

• had such a meltdown (you know, the post-day-puffy-eyed kind) over one adoption, only to feel all the more strong for it at the end. Though one would imagine such an "episode" to drain one small, tired, pre-adoptive, ever-waiting parent, it actually brought out the Mama-Bear. And if the Fight or Flight instinct were ever evident, it would have been during those harsh moments. I will not be torn down. I WILL KEEP FIGHTING. Don't ever, ever, ever get between a mother and her child. You. Will. Lose. Every time.

More serious conversationing (oh, who am I kidding - monologuing) on the above moments to follow.